church, spiritual

If the Shoe Don’t Fit

If the shoe don't fit...wear it. That's not how the saying goes. But I think, in some cases, that's reality. When you try on a new pair of shoes in a store, there's some discomfort. You wiggle your toes, inspect with your eyes, stand up, pace the aisles...and make a decision as to whether or… Continue reading If the Shoe Don’t Fit

arts & creativity, church, ministry

Recovering from Spiritual Abuse: “We’re Listening”

Alternative title for this post: "That Awkward Moment When You Ask A Minister If You Can Please Use A Bad Word In Church"  CREATIVE EXPRESSION: "We're Listening" A few days ago, I got to share a bit of writing at an event called "8 Minutes Max," an open forum at Church of the Incarnation which… Continue reading Recovering from Spiritual Abuse: “We’re Listening”

church, ministry

Recovering from Spiritual Abuse: “I’m Listening”

Last week, while "Speaking Out About Spiritual Abuse," I suggested that not listening lies at the root of spiritual abuse. So, fittingly, I think listening lies at the root of spiritual abuse recovery.  It starts with telling one person -- a counselor, minister, mentor, or trusted friend. Eventually, some people benefit from wider audiences, perhaps sharing… Continue reading Recovering from Spiritual Abuse: “I’m Listening”

church, ministry

Speaking Out About Spiritual Abuse

According to Spiritual Abuse Recovery Resources, spiritual abuse "occurs when someone in a position of spiritual authority misuses that authority, placing themselves over God’s people to control, coerce, or manipulate them for seemingly godly purposes which are really their own purposes." What does that actually look like? Author and speaker Mary DeMuth gives "10 ways… Continue reading Speaking Out About Spiritual Abuse

church, spiritual

Rethinking Church & Comfort

Myth #2: Church should be comfortable. At least at the Ash Wednesday service I went to yesterday, church was rather uncomfortable. It involved a fair amount of time kneeling, waiting, feeling uncertain about what was even going on. During one stretch of kneeling, my thought process went something like this: Alright, we were told to reflect... But… Continue reading Rethinking Church & Comfort